This One Trick Boosted My Dating App Success in My 40s
Dating apps are a minefield – but when I was using them, I found there was one thing that got me more attention than anything else.
The golden ticket to a mountain of matches? Pictures where I was grinning. Smiling snaps got me more matches than serious photos. Why? Because basic psychology says you are more likely to trust a smiling person and more inclined to feel happier around them (it's called emotional contagion). You perceive them as warmer and, believe it or not, more competent.
A new study also shows smiling makes you significantly more attractive to people than having Botox, according to a report in The Times that said a study by Tilburg University in the Netherlands found having Botox increases your attractiveness by 0.07 on a scale of one to seven. So, if you were a five before you got pricked, you’d be a 5.07 after.
Smiling, on the other hand, raises you 0.4 on the same scale. Makeup was even better and upped you 0.6. Which, deploying my GCSE maths skills, I know is significant.
'Hurrah!' shout all the needle naysayers, vindicated in their dislike and distrust of tweakments.
Why bother with Botox?
So, why would anyone bother splashing out £200 plus and getting ouchy injections in their face for such a small reward on the attractiveness scale, you might ask.
I'm not a Botox pusher, but I think this isn't the whole story.
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Full disclosure: my first Botox session was after I'd had my son in my early 30s. I was knackered, and I looked it. I was very nervous about the whole experience and felt I was crossing some kind of moral Rubicon. Was I vain? Foolhardy? Would I end up looking weird? I tried to explain this to the doctor, who brushed off my concerns in an arrogant manner. I was low-key traumatised by the experience.
But then, three days later, I woke up and looked in the mirror and the effects were nothing short of incredible. Refreshed. Like I'd been to a spa for two weeks. People kept asking me if I'd been on holiday. Lines were smoothed, brows were lifted a little, eyes made more open.
Having Botox is a personal choice and I'm not in any way saying people should have it or need it, but as a journalist, I also think everyone deserves to know this treatment had more of an effect than any anti-ageing cream I have ever tried. And I have tried thousands.
Digging deeper
The aforementioned Dutch study was conducted using before and after photos, and as someone who has been part of a lot of shoots, I know makeup and a smile create very obvious changes in a picture, whereas Botox is something that shows up more in 3D or IRL. But it's a subtle effect - or should be if it's done right.
So if the participants saw Botox in real life, they might find the recipient more enticing and attractive. That said, with smiling being so powerful, I'm off to get my teeth cleaned and polished (at my go-to dentist, the fabulous Luceo Dental ).
This costs significantly less than Botox, and emerging from their clinic with a whiter, brighter smile gives me a great confidence boost - and it's needle-free!
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